I can't for the life of me figure out why I ruin everything. I finally found a really great guy who liked me and cared about and wanted to do anything in his power to make me happy..... but I just didn't "feel" it. Why? Why must I constantly let my ex boyfriend get in my head and let me ruin things? I wish I didn't wake up every morning thinking about him. I wish my mind didn't wander to thoughts of him through out the day. I wish I didn't reach for my phone time after time to call or text him. I wish I didn't long to lay next to him when I go to bed at night. When will this end? Why can't I find someone that I like more than him. Who takes my mind off him..? There are some days that I want him so bad it hurts. I replay conversations and perfect moments in my mind. I can hear him singing every song on the radio..... I can hear him singing a song to me on the phone. Why can't I just let myself be happy without him? Why can't I un-fall in love with him....
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